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“Why can’t I pray like I used to?” This question comes to us again and again in bursts of frustration from believers of all ages. One lady wrote, “I have a lack of desire for prayer, and even if I try to pray, I can’t pray. I can’t concentrate; my mind frustrates me, and I just want to give up on praying. What do I do? I need my prayer life back. I need my study life back, and I need fellowship with the Holy Spirit back.” As believers, we know that we need to pray. We know it. But when it comes to prayer, a lot of Christians go by what they feel. They experience times when the presence of the Lord is so real, so tangible, that they want that feeling to accompany every time of prayer. When it doesn’t, there is disappointment, and disappointment can crush the desire to pray. Other Christians feel that they’ve got to pray a certain way, in a certain place, for a certain amount of time—as in down on their knees, at a church altar, for hours—before it counts as “real” prayer. Don’t misunderstand, there’s nothing wrong with praying on your knees or at an altar, but you don’t have to “position” yourself a certain way or for a certain length of time to seek God.
Maybe it helps to look at prayer as conversation with the Lord and understand that not all conversations are emotional or long. Just talk to the Lord. My husband and I pray throughout the day, talking to the Lord as things come up—it may just be for a second or two, or it may last several minutes, but we’re praying and seeking the Lord. In Romans 12:12, the apostle Paul wrote, “continuing instant in prayer,” which speaks of the privilege that we have as believers to speak to the Creator of all things at any time we desire to do so.
We also need to understand that Satan fights the prayer life of believers as he fights nothing else. Why? Because prayer is the strength of the believer in the sense that it’s where we receive our leading, guidance, and direction by the Holy Spirit. In prayer, we are addressing someone who can do anything for us—absolutely anything—for with God all things are possible.
And don’t forget about praise and worship, which is part of prayer. Here at the office, there are fast-moving days when important decisions need to be made, and those decisions have deadlines. I could allow such pressures to weigh me down, but instead I’ve learned to just stop and worship the Lord. There are other times when, throughout the day, I find myself just praising the Lord for His help, for His mercy, and for His grace toward me, my family, and this ministry. Again, it’s not always for long periods of time. It may not be more than five minutes or ten minutes, but it’s continuous, and it keeps me in touch with the Lord, and that is all prayer.
I have had Christians tell me that when they try to pray, after five or ten minutes, they run out of things to say to the Lord. If you think about it, not having much to say to someone that you claim you’re close to is usually an indicator that something is wrong in that relationship. What would your spouse or your child or your friend think if you couldn’t hold a five-minute conversation with them? Of course they would withdraw, and the relationship suffers.
It’s the same with us and the Lord. Without prayer, there can be no proper communion with Him, and our relationship with Him is greatly hindered. This can result in spiritual stagnation, or worse.
If you find yourself struggling to pray, I would urge you to make a fresh start and begin your prayer time by first thanking the Lord. The Psalmist said, “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name” (Ps. 100:4).
Thank Him for saving you. Thank Him for your family. Thank Him for the roof over your head. Thank Him for your car; it may not be the best vehicle on the road, but you’re not walking. Thank Him for the clothes on your back. Thank Him for the food you have to eat; you’re not going hungry. Thank Him for your job; it may not be the job you wanted, but it affords you to care for yourself or your family. Thank Him for the Holy Spirit who dwells within you, leads, and guides you. Thank Him that He can help you in decision-making. Thank Him that He can help you learn and study the Bible. Thank Him because when you die, you’re going straight to heaven where the Lord has prepared a place for you. And after thanking Him, just tell Him, “I love You, Lord. I love You.” Express to Him your sincere gratitude and love for all He has done for you, and then wait for Him to respond—and He will respond.
So many Christians pray reactively, asking God only for what they need, but Jesus said, “Your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him” (Matt. 6:8). So prayer is not just petition. It includes worship, communion, fellowship, and consecration. It involves far more than just asking the Lord for something. Consider how the bond between a father and a child strengthens when that child says, with a full heart and open arms, “I love you, Dad.” God is not a machine, He’s a person, and He has feelings exactly as we have, although to a different degree. He wants communication with His children. So commit to a set prayer time each day and enter into it by thanking the Lord for all that He has done for you and then seek His guidance for direction and help. When you do, I believe you’ll see your life change dramatically for the better. And don’t listen to the devil say that you can’t do it because you can—you can pray!
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